SUNDAY, 18 MARCH 2012
Chiddy Bang – Breakfast
How Chiddy Bang ever got to the stage of releasing an album is beyond me. Mildly famous due to their cover of MGMT’s ‘Kids’ entitled ‘Opposite of Adults’ (see what they did there?) they probably should have faded away by now. But still they hang on.
I wouldn’t worry too much though as their main demographic is probably pre-schoolers if title track ‘Breakfast’ is anything to go by. Helpfully instructing listeners to ‘get your plate, get your fork, get your spoon -Yeah, it’s time to have breakfast!’ Fun and informative! It’s actually neither. Furthermore, if that wasn’t enough, we are even enlightened to the fact it ‘goes well with OJ’ – presumably the juice not the American football player.
Overall, this album seems to sort of exist without actually performing any function. Of course there is a place for fun music, not everything has to be groundbreaking, but unfortunately this is neither, to the extent where they sound like they’d rather just be doing something else. And so would I.
Their cry of: ‘I’m Ray Charles’, the lead single, apart from triggering an involuntary ‘no you’re not’ in a similarly repetitive tone, does little to further their cause. Nonetheless, it is undeniably catchy, but so are lots of things, like flu.
‘Does she love me?’ sees one of our little pop princes worried that a girl doesn’t love him because he has leprosy, no matter how many times he cries: ‘I aint got leprosy!’ – or something like that. My advice? Get yourself to a doctor and give her some proof!
This pattern of irritating pop continues, with ‘This Is Happening’ – imagine a Cher Lloyd song which even she rejected – unfortunately reminding me that I genuinely am listening to this.
Generally every song sounds almost exactly the same and follows the same format of: nauseating synth introduction, mildly inoffensive rap, instantly forgettable chorus, some more generally off putting keyboards, another chorus and then if you’re lucky, the end, which overall results in a shallow album that you probably wouldn’t want to listen to more than once.